Dear LEO:

My girlfriend has a daughter who is a friggin brat. I clench my teeth and smile a lot. She asked me if she could have some money for the ice cream man. I told her no. Then she hit me with their cat. Is this me being insensitive to the kids ice cream request and/or animal cruelty?

~Dan

Dear DAN: Original screen name. With an imagination like yours, in the event of a breakup, she could only find someone to top you if she dates Walt Disney. Back to the little lactose swilling brat… next time tell her she can have money, but only after the ice cream man starts to pull away, forcing her to lend brief chase but to no avail. When she comes back dejected, you can hand her the cat and explain that girls who are nice to animals generally get ice cream.